I like to sleep at night; and I like to sleep WELL. Without doubts and "What ifs" and all KINDS of questions floating around in my head. For me, it's pretty simple. Every night before I go to sleep I review my day and I ask myself just ONE QUESTION: Did I do the Best I could do today?
Whether relating to business with a client, a personal relationship and just dealing with the public in general on ANY level, I want to know I did my best. It's really all we can do. My daughter called me tonight upset this time; it seems her project for school did not turn out as she had hoped. As a matter of fact, it didn't turn out well at all and she knew this. But in this particular class they critique eachothers' work. And some of the others, in attempts at honesty can actually be quite brutal.
I asked her the same question I ask myself and the same one she's heard many times from me over the years---"Did you do the BEST you can?" She always answers yes, she's a hard worker and very mindful of others. And I gently remind her that if she has, there is nothing else she could have done. When you've done your best, given what you had to work with and think about at the time, there should be no guilt, shame or regret.
If, for some reason I realize I haven't done my best, I will do everything I possibly can to correct it as soon as possible. For myself as much as for anyone else; because, in the end, I have to live with myself and I at least want to LIKE myself :) I don't want to be SEEN, I WANT TO SEE. Reviewing my day allows me to do that.
If you hit a situation that distresses you for one reason or another, ask yourself that one simple question. I'm willing to bet you'll be sleeping a lot better.
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Hi Carole,
I really enjoyed reading your post you are a very good writer.
Anthony
Thanks Carole, your posts are always so helpful and leave me feeling much better about the world and everything in it. I agree, that's all we can do is the best with what we've got....it's all anyone can do.
Your daughter is very lucky to have you as her Mom...
Jo
Carole,
The simplicity of your message matches my way of thinking. Very nicely stated. On the other hand sometimes even when we do our best it isn't good enough. An example in point: If you hire a contractor that doesn't know anything about drainage issues, he could in fact do his best. But is his best good enough for you.
I agree 100% (maybe more if that counts) that anyone learning can only do their best.......then with feedback they will know if this is "good enough" for that field, or that job, assignment, or whatever. At a certain point in life there are times, and situations that someones "best" might not be good enough after al
You stated: "If, for some reason I realize I haven't done my best, I will do everything I possibly can to correct it as soon as possible. " Beautiful, True, and mature, spoken from self-reflection, hopefully the only true reflection on whether we do indeed sleep well at night :)
Carole - I sleep well, I am usually satisfied with my days work. I learn long ago you just can't please everyone.
I have also told my son that as long as he does his best, he should not beat himself up if the outcome is not quiet what he expected.
WooHoo! You know that's me too! I love to ...sleep well at night.
After I lie down to go to sleep at night, I review my day in my head. Some days I am very pleased and others I am not. But, I do try very hard to give everything my all and sometimes I have to remind myself that even that does not always bring the results we want. A good post and I can tell you are a great Mom.
Carole: I used to sleep well at night until I discovered Active Rain. Now I am mostly in a zombie state as I try to keep up and feed my AR addiction LOL.
I look at every day that I wake up as another undeserved gift for which I am very grateful to have and another chance to do better than the day before. It's a chance to wipe the slate clean and start again. No matter how hard we may try, there will always be those days that didn't go as well as we would like. So, as long as the sun continues to rise, I will use each chance to get it right.
Anthony, Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. With all the terrific writers on AR I'm afraid I can't compare but it still doesn't stop me :) I wish you a wonderful day.
Diana, I'm sorry that's happening to you and I know the feeling. I used to have a terrible habit of always second guessing myself; if I said or did the right thing. I didn't want to do that anymore so now it's down to one question. And really, if you can say yes to that, what more do you need or want? Thank you for your comment and I know things will turn around soon.
Maggie, Thank you. My daughter is so hard on herself (aren't we all?) and I have to keep reminding her that we try and try but no one is perfect! Thanks for reading and commenting on my post.
Oh Candy, You may want to catch my next post. And don't be mad!!
Robert, Thank you. It's one question that allows me to look myself in the mirrow and sleep--well! Have a great day!
Lisa, Thank you, I intend to sleep well. I don't do things half way (which believe it or not is not always good!) because I put my heart and soul into most things....I usually have a really good night's sleep and I have no doubt you do as well!
Sally, I KNOW you love your sleep. And I know you get a great night's sleep every single night; probably would get great naps, too :)
Joan, What a nice thing to say.....Coming from THE MAVEN HERSELF, I really appreciate it!
Cynthia, You'd have to ask my daughter about the great mom part. She already LOVES you for your recipes. For someone who can't cook (me) to be turning out these food dishes I am amazing myself :) I don't think you need to review much, I think you are like most of the people on here---you do your best every day.
Diane, We don't always have all the facts or information and we all make mistakes. But I can tell you are the type of person that does your best. I fix what I can if I realize an error but I'm not so hard on myself anymore.
Teri, You always say it perfectly. No, none of us are perfect and I'm far, FAR from it...but I do try and do my best. I'm sure you sleep quite well!
Donna, I love what you wrote. I am exhausted half the time too and I keep reading and commenting on just "one" more post. I have started to limit my comments to between 20 and 23 a day....that's progress!
Hi Carole, Funny you wrote this... I wasn't able to sleep until I divorced both husbands.... go figure! Now I lay my head and BAM out like a light! :)
Lysa, I give you credit for figuring out the problem. It always looks like you're not only out having a great time, you're doing people a LOT of good and that's so inspiring! Thanks for your comment (and I'm still laughing, sorry!)
Dianne, We can only try. My daughter came home again this weekend and seems to have forgotten all about it....I'm glad! I think many of us are too hard on ourselves, unfortunately. Have a wonderful night!
We must always do to others what we would want them to do to us..I think that's been said before. ANYWAY, I always treat people with respect and as if they are part of my family. I hope that when my children are in contact with people that they too would be treated that way. Doing our best must be foremost in our minds because afterall it is OUR NAME that is behind our businesses.
I tell people that I have to answer to a higher authority.
Phyllis Pafumi
Phyllis, My father used to say the best thing he could leave his children was his good name. I've never changed mine because I believe that as well. He's a hard act to follow, but I try. Thank you for your comment.
Chrissy, Sleeping well is crucial to restoring for the next day. It's a concern to me that I find more clients that are not sleeping well at night for one reason or another then that say they have no sleep issues. Thank you for stopping by and commenting.
Very simply smart words!
I sleep well, but it is a trained habit of letting go for me.
A Seeing friend.......
Loretta, Thank you for your very sweet comment. I don't often remember my dreams, I'm not sure exactly what that means. But when I am struggling with an issue I'll sometimes just wake up with the answer (I love when that happens :)
Deborah, I've said it before and I'm saying it again, it is SO nice to see you back! I know you are one who "sees" -- I don't believe we are here to "be seen," I believe we are here to "see." Quite a difference. Have a wonderful day!